Can the love let nature take its course? ? ?
Today, a friend tells me, he will let his emotion let nature take its course on the net. Ground without rhyme or reason, heart sink, seem, have what far things was torn out for a long time. Then I roll off the production line, not the mood. 18 year old one age that girl can remember most, terribly what the youth is flown upward. I loved a boy during 18 years old, left at the age of 21 again. While discussing the love at first, I believe in truly: Let nature take its course. I have not minded he once exerted oneself and loved a girl; Have not minded he suffers from hepatitis C; It is the only boy of the family, 3 elder sisters and 3 mothers like him not to take notice of him. I just experience so truly, love. It is over that we are really happy, I believe this firmly. However, can not start well and end well. In 2 years later on, we begin to quarrel over, he will walk out on me by the rockery very coolly, go back to dormitory. I, go back to cry, then go to look for him, then become reconciled. I do not have girl's due so-called means, I just let nature take its course, obey my heart. Mother says to me: "You good person, but two good person may not necessarily pass auspicious day. " My agony, but I am still as before, because my heart tells me, I am loving him, and he, loves me. He has graduated. I wait in the school. . . . . . It seems to be the dusk of a spring, I make a phone call to him, ask when he comes to meet me, because made an appointment to go to his home. He says his woman colleague celebrates birthday, a little at night. I wait until 9:30, he pages me, to put it briefly: " I go home now, you come over by oneself! " I in this side of the telephone, freeze like this. The first time, whom he can succeed in so let me feel to care he! I was after going through the talk many times and ending up with his silence at last, propose not meeting him again, unless he comes to talk to me carefully. In fact, only I am clear, I at that time faced graduating, had already considered our marriage. For him, I give up, go the intersection of city and chance of focal point, choose first 3 kinds of schools, only because this is the school closest to his home that I can go. So, his attitude is extremely important to me. Wait of 40 days! But the length remembering this period of time of mine without the concept to the figure at all times. Then he has come, the ones that remain as before are careless, I have not said anything, have become reconciled. He attitude toward me feel surprised slightly, he it thinks to be can some ones that quarrel over originally perhaps, he can not know my tears have already flowed to the limit in the day when wait for, has been led on the paper off too. I just unwilling to give up, I to confide all all of me in this man of love so! I have given up all of my reason, leave feeling to draw, the people who skeptical about every love to us despise. . . . . . I have given, one's own last chance, I gambled with large stake finally with all emotions! I have failed. On the last summer vacation of the university, I am so lonely as to go home. Mother has found out my gloom, but nothing clever is said. Having gone back to Beijing, he is still so cool, says: " please come! " So on call at any hour, the ones that waved went promptly. Ha Ha Ha! I wanly smile three, stay campus 4 year for me " whether the intersection of pot and pot spend name " Grieved. Others all say he can not see me, whoes knows it is I that can not keep him! I say: " whether tomorrow! " In whole night, I did not sleep, wrote a letter with the most calm heart, said in the letter: Let's say good-bye! But I am unwilling eventually! ! The next day, I went to his home, said to oneself: The last chance, if he keeps me, I leave, marry him. If. . . . . . Every scene that I remember that day so far. I stay punishing in the bit of his home, the book, clothes, having that bag of toys. . . . . . I say I have dormitories, there are places that have put the things, moreover, should change according to the season. He helps me to tidy up. 4 handbags! ! In this space that totally belongs to him, have unexpectedly I left so many things? ? Moreover, these can be just seen, those are silent to look for the invisible one? ? I lift to watch, he, he is looking at me too, I know he understands my struggle, he does not urge to stay. No longer take his parents in the outer room into account, I sit into his chest, embrace him deeply, confide all all of mine - -Kiss him. I set the letter free on his drawer before leaving, there was my letter given to him in the past the inside those, under my letter, is that girl's letter given to him that year. I once flowed through tears for this, later - -No. In a moment at the end that I get on the bus, I let go of his hands, tell him to come back home to read the letter. Later on the intersection of story and old stuff very much, he found him wrong, originally thought it was only " ran away from home " angrily It was unmanageable that unexpectedly developed. He come, look for I, say, take well, chase me one. . . . . . 2 year, accompany our country pass he for Mid-autumn Festival never, will send the moon cake to our school every year; He will send a present here too on my birthday. But I know, what I only lost arises once, so I do not turn round. Must think of aching after aching definitely, I can blame him completely, I found at last. Because in course of letting nature take its course that me think all the time, I lose too many chances. I thought I just love himmed, I let him think I was his definitely. But I have forgotten, I do not understand in other words, love, really need managing! By managing the love wholeheartedly, it is not false absolutely! When I knew how, had embarrassed the blue sea already.
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