A young married woman's psychological obstacle of narcissism

A young married woman's psychological obstacle of narcissism
The small leaf pursues beautiful dressing, the beautiful makings are blameless, but she is unable to accept one's own hair is fluffy in the life of sexual love, the dress is not whole, the face that the lead powder used in cosmetics is returned, that is a kind of psychological obstacle. The progress of modern civilization pays attention to the improvement of people's life quality more and more. However, the quality of the life is not packing unilaterally by the material, especially enliven the quality in the concealed sexual life of floor of life, it is more difficult to go by the material" Preserve value " ,Ensure their inherent quality by a lot of spirit that can not perhaps understand by even oneself, psychological factor. And say there are women that just crossed thirty years of age to calculate experts quickly in one famous institution of higher learning in Beijing, being at a young age to calculate educational circles quickly, appear on the list at home and abroad already, she invite, participate in, audit the United Nations to Africa, the intersection of Asia and key work of aid project ever, the audit advisor's post about the international financial institution that serving as, still investigate taking on the audit about government's project the subject is presided over, she is a young leaf. Say strictly, the small leaf is not that kind of beautiful and outstanding women. But she is dignified and generous, the style of conversation is graceful and cordial, especially wear clothes and make up, it is proper to match, it is humorous to shut color, fashionable in style instead of publicizing, every slight is perfect. She had already got married nearly three years ago. The husband is the doctor studying in Britain and returning to the homeland, handsome and graceful, dignified in appearance, have a bright and cheerful disposition, the humour and rigorous of style of conversation, it is outstanding to deserve to be called. It is a chief delegate of the organization stationed in China of the group in some Shang of Germany now. Heat admire this pair of outstanding men and women to know well their people all without exception. However, the deep emotional crisis has taken place to them, the husband of the little leaf has proposed divorcing by agreement. The small leaf is said: "I disagree with divorcing, because I love you. " The husband says: "It is the formal couple, you and I have no passion at all to make love, why prove that there is love, if you only worship the Plato type love, then, I say to you I am sorry, because you select people by mistake, I too vulgar to be endured in requirement in life in couple, I need to shut the sexual relations in harmony. " During following several months, the small leaf makes great efforts to arouse the mood of oneself and husband's private life. However, she can not make, as she dresses up oneself very charmingly, very sexily, very at the time of the beauty, she always thinks that there is excited requirement eagerly on husband. But once passion set out, even if one wisp bright in the room, small leaf avoid a mirror that appear under illusion at the moment still. She will see oneself in the mirror at once, the hair is fluffy, the dress is not whole, but the facial cosmetics have been wiped into a big flowery face, one's own expression is extremely lascivious, extremely ugly It dump at once the she one enthusiasm but under cold water put out by water,let husband loving deeply in oneself not satisfied wanting she, but she can only maintain one on purpose and artificial At last, the husband was difficult to be tolerant. At this night, the husband pushes away her, is panting and jumping off the bed to sit into the sofa one connects one and smokes suddenlying, ask her with the unprecedented gloomily tone: "Whether you are very in pain when acting in a play like this. Have a word I bear, explain really, I feel, make love in and the wife more and more, and feel that looking like a prostitute should pay the boring frequenter Not painful for us, while we have no child, say good-bye " The small leaf has been listened to, the knife cuts the general pain in the heart, she has cried. She say oneself heart intimidate beautiful and helpless at the mirror in the face of get rid of the intersection of other side and illusion that lose. The husband keeps silent, half on the day, say: "I believe your words, but you must go to see a psychologist. " Peking University, experienced doctor Li consulting room in making a diagnosis and giving treatment in psychology. Doctor Li particularly looks out to the implements in the little leaf illusion. This person treat the intersection of people and affable the intersection of middle age and woman doctor prop up with little leaf husband, have a chat the daily life of blowing with small leaf cordial and careless. Small leaf, the rural girl from the Northeast Liaodong Peninsula. As a child, the family circumstances were poverty-stricken, mother was half a deaf and dump disabled person of one, father was a township ironsmith, also the aunt become in Jinzhou into a shop-assistant, not born in several years after marriage a drunkard, she and 12 years old is adopted, study after entering the primary school of Jinzhou. Having reached aunt's home, as the aunt has a bath to comb one's hair for her, change the uncle and go on business after the beautiful clothes bought for her specially in Dalian, she the first time see intact controlling oneself in the big full-length mirror of wardrobe from the intersection of aunt and house till to now, and the beautiful girl who she dressed up in a city that is never seen in gully home of the ditch. Aunt and uncle love her. But she whether the intersection of Lian County and city does not enter several the intersection of countryside and girl after all, unavoidable to mock by classmate. Whenever it is hurt and wronged to receive, especially the aunt knows she has received the grievance, always takes pains to dress up her, take her to that big full-length mirror and comfort her: "Let them see than have we every of them. " Appearance introversive but personality eager to do well in everything low leaf by look in the mirror hard like this nearly, only rise up into the key middle school with the excellent achievement in two years, from young girl period, she pays attention to one's own clothing, bearing, style of conversation, image with the psychology more sensitive than other children. Her efforts diligently in study, it is unwilling to be lag behind everywhere. And her image, the getting overcritical stage that can't be careless at all, this makes she to a sheet of sound praised. Once, go to the countryside to take part in the work, in the evening, lie on the big kang of the peasant family, she hears the classmates whispering, who is most beautiful of the male and female students that appraise in the class, classmate says: " my mother says that has not seen so beautiful a girl of small leaf, " Person who say not be in the mood for, listener have the intention, small leaf the careless commendation so excited that sleep all night at all for household. The little leaf braved the wind and the waves on the study, not merely became the famous transcendent woman master of science of institution of higher learning at the age of 26, and show up prominently in calculating the speciality quickly. Her outlook has been widened, see the world, knowledge and training make she and enter from countryside the intersection of people and the intersection of Jinzhou and the little girl of city become quite a different person she begin to have emotion to pursue originally. When the small leaf pursues the master degree to nearly graduate, she, to a Brazilian overseas Chinese student's clock purpose to some extent. Contacts several times, but that boy is getting cold to her, quickly, she hears that boy appraise her and say: "' the demeanour of a well-bred girl ' of the small leaf is really artificial. " Nobody knows, the small leaf is facing toward the mirror and examine one's own " artificial " for this sentence The once dark tears flowed long. It is difficult to sleep with people in several nights and several nights. She went to Singapore to participate in academic activity and present Zhang greatly and meet and know at the age of 27, that is a friendship ties cocktail party, as this one when annual 29 -year-old white collar gentleman has just rushed into her eye, she thought immediately she has dreamt of for many years by oneself " The charming prince " Appeared at last, is permeated with her between this young and handsome man's behavior Think with that kind of aesthetic feeling of matching most by oneself. She has not still more expected, as the dance music was played, this lover can be coming up to her straight unexpectedly, invite her to dance, and say kissing quickly: "First of my has been attracted by your extreme poise. " In the following time, they date again and again, but before each appointment, the small leaf has been always dressed up in the mirror sedulously for a long time ago. It is perfect to make one's own image. Two people are both very outstanding, two people are both very successful, will certainly get rid of the trouble of the custom of those market during the love. But newly-married that night, small leaf boiling and easy to want in the heart, cast a side-look thin getting green oneself on the mirror on the dressing table that desk lamp take the picture unintentionally, she felt suddenly the extreme one was frightened and flurried for a moment, she was difficult unexpectedly to push away the husband controlling oneself, have been wrapped up in oneself closely tightly with the quilt. Hereafter, burn when the whom she go to bed each time mirror repair at nightfall oneself soon, the desire to spend merry eve together with the husband always runs high to the upper limit sharply, and once and the husband snuggles up to and gathers around, that oneself fearing to be seen most in the mirror appear at the moment, the frightened and flurried sense at heart will overwhelm everything in the idea, she has been wanting to get rid of desperately all the time, however, this mirror looks like devils, want to get rid of appearing when shouldn't appear ing Small leaf say she suspect suffer from psychosis already, doctor Li say little situation of leaf as terrible as psychosis, but psychological illness has been really already very serious. Doctor Li says, the small leaf is a typical psychological obstacle of narcissism. The sense of loving to make up and wearing beautiful clothes, the own beauty of discovery owned by everyone, respect one's own beauty, cherish one's own beauty, this kind of " narcissism " The psychology is nearly not at all surprising. And however, to most people, this kind of psychology makes him go to the society to look for the starting point leading to success, establish the important psychological ground substances of self-confidence and courage. But one people award the intersection of narcissism and psychology that form by oneself since by extreme, one feel self-humiliation with narcissism for a potential one psychology look for balanced psychological mechanism, if can't well overcome, it is extremely apt to develop into the psychological morbid state. Equilibrate, feel self-humiliation narcissism of psychology, can self- approval in narcissism sensitive extremely in factor often, fear one's own vivid or behavioral defect different to tolerate. Find, think difficult to appreciate, even difficult to accept idea that yearn for at once broken while being difficult to oneself, kill, the psychology feeling self-humiliation is more serious instead, even pessimistic and desperate. Doctor Li says, the psychological obstacle of the small leaf obviously belongs to the latter. The small leaf overcomes one's own feeling self-humiliation with the psychological mechanism of a kind of self-appreciation from childhood, and encourage encouraging oneself to succeed in the undertaking and love two from this, but perfect oneself is the self- approval of her narcissism in that mirror, so, when finding that presenting one in the mirror can't be approved oneself, her heart will produce the self-confident one waveringly, the psychology will make her greatly alarmed if the potential one feels self-humiliation, and such psychological conflict of her take place make love, in husband exactly, therefore bring about distortion in her sex psychology. Whoever started the trouble should end it. Doctor Li say to little leaf psychology treat have miraculous cure, the doctor finds factory's psychological crux for the patient, real rescuing is still controlled oneself by the patient. As to the small leaf. She must have a brand-new understanding on U.S.A., U.S.A. is relative too. It is impossible that the small leaf pursues a kind of absolute one beautifully, and the manifestation of obsession. Sexual love a physical and mental one throw talent, beautiful foot have in the life, decorate, reflect the natural physiology American fully, at this moment beautiful to come, it appraises to be objective, actually by husband only, likes to be beautiful, if can't accept, put it in other places in sex that that mirror shines upon you, must not let it hinder from you passionate to wave raising. Should tell the wife on precisely as to the husband of the little leaf, you appreciate wife's beauty at ordinary times, appreciate the beauty when she lives in the sexual love very much too, should shift the wife and force Lenovo at the point of key with caressing and language. A successful sexual life will bring to you and transfer, know therefore production in the wife's confidence, her decoration dresses up the conscientious and meticulous abundant embodiment that will be her high-quality makings, she will go out of the shade, will only exist for oneself, will not mind others' appraisal again. [Blameless that the small leaf pursues beautiful dressing, beautiful makings that the psychologist comments on ], but she is unable to accept the hair is fluffy, the dress is not whole, according to the etiquette type image which China takes off in the life of sexual love, besides prone to strong narcissisming, the forcing personality obstacle formed since the childhood that I'm afraid, or the acquired idea that appears is forced (the persistent moment to pursue the self-image is perfect) ,It is a more important psychological reason, so, the task of top priority of the small leaf is to look for a psychologist, rescue one's own psychological obstacle. From this case, we can also find out, psychological disease patient, all have its own causes of disease and intricate behavioral manifestation. Transfer it to from the three nine-day periods after the winter solstice health network

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